Your love is just a lie'-'

Friday, November 23

FRIDAY

woke up at 6.30am
YAWNS so tired. din sleep well
get changed, trained to woodlands
wenjia's mum take us to bedok:)
thankyou haha. omg i very jing zhang:/
den waited for everyone to reach den took bus17
to st.anthony.. coach zhong is there too! haha
their skool got burger venting machine so cool
den went to the hall den do warm up den stroke
me and mf played in the third round.
we won!:D made alot of mistakes:/
coach walked pass, so stress:(
denn left the skkol ard 12 den me and mf and brenda
went back while the rest go eat. me and mf trained to amk buy things
saw daryl haha. den went red tomato den went hm.
my next time seeing mf is next next week:/
haha miss her. walked home. ate mee.. slack slack.
felt dizzy den fall asleep ard 4=p
woke up ard 6plus=x
ate dinner den i was here hehex..

JOSEPH NG! I MISS YOU! HAHA.
FASTER COME BACK! =D TAKE CARES!

a broken heart can nv be mended

there will always be a scar

my life is so boring.. i hate it. and yoo

♥ The cry of my heart -Yeah im smiling:D but im dying inside

3:25:00 AM

YYY

Saturday, November 17

lalala

FRIDAY
woke up ard 11plus=x
had another weird dream =xx
wenjia called me tt she will be early
den i quickly eat mee den get ready
set off to yck . we were the earliest lol
we chat chat chat . den stroke stroke
brenda and linda came, they joined in
brenda and wenjia keep laughing non stop
HAHA! den start warm up
coach came. den PT OMG
he is holding on to his watch!
timing! die. STRESS. if din meet the timing
mus do one more time. den i kana once :(
will suicide man xl
den relays! zonghan's grp VS mel's grp
1st: run 5courts go and back 2 times! we won:)
2nd:throwing shuttles to each other. we lost:(
3rd:hopping. we won:)
4th:holding hands and crab walk. we won:)
5th:walking with hands. we lost:(
sorry tt i din take part:/ my backbone cant take it
PUNISHMENT:do 15push-ups den stand up clap clap
FINALLY OVER! play match time!:)
more relax. pheww. play play play
den 6 alrd! go bathe!
went to amk hub meet owl for dinner
he was late-.- suan le:)
saw calvin ang! i went to him and said hi
den he was like ni shi shui . =.=!!!!
and he gave me tt look. arghhs
den i say me la!! den he say byebye.LOL. spastic.
ate western food at S11 . YUMMYS! =P
den anyhow walk walk. den went home:)

SATURDAY
woke up ard 12plus tdy=x
changed bedsheet, ate rice
bathe den went to find shirly
she said she was in her grandma hse.
den the door nv lock den i went in,
i locked and walked in . den she called
she was next door! wth i lock myself LOL
den watch dunno wat show till 2plus
den gt ready den set off to amk hub
den took train to bishan and start our job hunting
but more like food hunting =x
den took bus53 to seragoon
sing K for 3hours! hehe. sing till chao high:D
den trained to sengkang zuo bo
met zhenann at mini toons:)
den took 159 hm..
ate dinner , slack watch tv den i was here.

ii was wondering if ii was wasting my time

and wondering if u're hiding

or wadeva it is , its childish . pls

since u been gone...

♥ The cry of my heart -Yeah im smiling:D but im dying inside

9:43:00 AM

YYY

Thursday, November 15

THURSDAY

woke up at 10

went downstairs buy breakfast for kor

and med for ah ma

den came hm bathe

ate mee watch zhong ji yi jia
den set off to amk mrt meet cha

den trained to town

den shop shop shop

she bought tickets for us b4 she left

got 12% discount =X haha

den waited for guang and hwee to come

we watching doraemon movie 255 at cineleisure

they reach ard 2plus

den we went newurban male see see

den went up to lvl9 catch our movie

wanted to buy hotdog meal but dont haf!

ran down to lvl5

OMG its like 250 den we were like

running ard like mad

lucky we were on time b4 it starts:D

doraemon's expression is funny!:D

love and concern look 0.0

HAHA.its quite nice, funny and touching(:

den the show ended the ending song is nice!

haha den i ranto the toilet =x

hehe den nnic and char came.

ehh SORRY ar den walked to ps

meet cha go the cathay eat ri ben cun

OMG. the rice is alot der lorr.

GUYS paiseh ar i din go there b4 =X

SORRY . den we go walk walk.

back to ps den to orchard.

den nic and char went back first

den next guang and hwee

me and cha go buy tie. den went far east

den i took 162 home.she took 132

162 is alot ppl der lor! squeezy

finally gt to sit down!

alighted and ran to the void deck and sat down

my legs hurt!! OUCH. den quickly walked back home

soaked my legs with warm water:D

my toes got blisters! :'( haix

den bathe and i was here:D

nic, pongpong, hwee get well soon!

char and jo take cares! CYA soon(:

ur absence meant to me .

but i shud be living happier! :D

smile always! and you! fuck off la

♥ The cry of my heart -Yeah im smiling:D but im dying inside

7:23:00 AM

YYY

Wednesday, November 14

lalalala

HAPPY BIRTHDAY KORKOR AND DARYL!! LOVES:D

long time din blog =p
TUESDAY
ytd went skool to buy textbooks
with guang and hwee
we wore home clothes
den we cant go in! wth
den we find teachers and all the ways to go in
but we cant:( den we saw jc and kimberly outside
kimberly came back to take report bk
den we waited outside the skool for like 3 hours
for my dearrdearr to come:)
they finally came! dearr help me buy:D THANKYOU
its ard 2 when they came out.
WE WAITED FOR THREE HOURS DEN WE ONLY GOT 3 BOOKS!
OMG la. but we gt chit chat haha
den kimberly went hm.
jc and his fren went bugis
guang, hwee and me go ps
guang go cut hair! new hairstyle!
nicenice:D den jc came ps find us
den we go orchard take neoneo
went hm den ordered KFC:D
12am gave kor bday cake:D
WEDNESDAY
woke up at 11plus, ate mee and kfc:)
denn got prepared and walked to mrt with cha
actually wan walk to yck den scare late
on the way saw weilun haha
den i trained there
training start:
played with wj and brenda
denn played the alternate thingy
den rest den do footworks. coach timed us!
20s for 10 times. 10sets of 10 :/
omg dying of tireness and panting
den rest den do drills den play match
SORRY guys cus u'll to do frog jumps
SORRY tt im moody or dao .
den end training. bathe den bus-ed home

i was wondering if all my doings are worth it

and will haf a gd results?

am i wasting my effort and time?

and wasting my life?

♥ The cry of my heart -Yeah im smiling:D but im dying inside

3:55:00 AM

YYY

Friday, November 9

HATE THAT I LOVE YOU

"Hate That I Love You"(feat. Ne-Yo)

[Rihanna:]

As much as I love you

As much as I need you

And I can't stand you

Must everything you do make me wanna smile

Can I not like you for awhile? (No....)

[Ne-Yo:]But you won't let meYou upset me girl

And then you kiss my lips

All of a sudden I forget (that I was upset)

Can't remember what you did

[Rihanna:]

But I hate it...

You know exactly what to do

So that I can't stay mad at you

For too long that's wrong

[Ne-Yo:]

But I hate it...

You know exactly how to touch

So that I don't want to fuss.. and fight no more

Said I despise that I adore you

[Rihanna:]

And I hate how much I love you boy (yeah...)

I can't stand how much I need you (I need you...)

And I hate how much I love you boy (oh whoa..)

But I just can't let you go

And I hate that I love you so (oooh..)

[Ne-Yo:]

You completely know the power that you have

The only one makes me laugh

[Rihanna:]

Said it's not fairHow you take advantage of the fact

That I... love you beyond the reason why

And it just ain't right

[Ne-Yo:]

And I hate how much I love you girl

I can't stand how much I need you (yeah..)

And I hate how much I love you girl

But I just can't let you go

But I hate that I love you so

[Both:]

One of these days maybe your magic won't affect me

And your kiss won't make me weak

But no one in this world knows me the way you know me

So you'll probably always have a spell on me...

[Ne-Yo:]

Yeaahhh... Oohh...

[Rihanna:]

As much I love you (as much as I need you)

As much as I need you (oooh..)

As much I love you (oh..)

As much as I need you

[Rihanna:]

And I hate that I love you so

And I hate how much I love you boy

I can't stand how much I need you (can't stand how much I need you)

And I hate how much I love you boy

But I just can't let you go (but I just can't let you go no..)

And I hate that I love you so

And I hate that I love you so.. so...

♥ The cry of my heart -Yeah im smiling:D but im dying inside

7:51:00 PM

YYY

woke up ard 10plus ?
onlline den slack slack
ate mee den get ready go training
reached dere. OMG STAIRS! CRIES!
playd tt alternate thingy ,hit once and run out.
this time i nearly bang into daryl. SORRY! =p
den rest den do duo qiu .. den cycling in air 400x!
den in the court i fell =X ouch .sprained my arm joint
i tink, gt the pain. the floor is slippery der lor! arghhs
den play matches.. den were asked to hop up the stairs
with one leg 10 times for each leg. OMG im dying laa
i fear of heights. i damn scared. i dowan!!! but i had to
i jump till i wanna cry. its like foring me to do smth i dun like
haix. "OH I REALLY LOVE YCK SPRT HALL DER TOILET LOR!"
its jus like my hiding place, i cried in there again..
haix. i felt so pathetic. :((
training ended i bathe den meet nic and guang at yck
den go penisular buy skinnies =DD
haha den trained to tampines eat dinner
abt 9.30 we had our dinner.
den guang pei us train back.
in train..nic play pokemon lols
den tt guang use him as a joke=.=NT FUNNY
den tt guang ki siao he scratch me!
i nv make dao him lo
i bet he miss his pongpong . lols
den i changed seat with nic !
den i alight at amk and its raining.
i walked briskly home den talked to char till 1am lidat
den i fall asleep and awake and i was here. yawns..

i felt pathetic dunno why

sudden realization of losing things

left cold and unwanted

u're living happily bastard.pls die

rly hope everything could restart.

♥ The cry of my heart -Yeah im smiling:D but im dying inside

7:23:00 PM

YYY

Thursday, November 8

walk me home

Baby would you walk me home
I don't want to go all the way alone
Baby would you walk with me home
Baby would you take my hand
Come with me now to our special land,
Baby would you walk with me home
It's three a.m. and you're on my mind once again
I must have been dreaming
I thought I felt your heartbeat just then
Then I wondered how it would be
if I was your lady and you were my friend
I would put my heart in your hands
And it would never end
Baby would you walk me home
I don't want to go all the way alone
Baby would you walk with me home
Baby would you take my hand
Come with me now to our special land,
Baby would you walk with me home
I hold your picture next to my heart all the time
Oh yeah baby
You're my dream come true so glad you're mine
Then I wondered how it would be
if I was your lady and you were my friend
I would put my heart in your hands
And it would never end
Baby would you walk me home
I don't want to go all the way alone
Baby would you walk with me home
Baby would you take my hand
Come with me now to our special land,
Baby would you walk with me home
Every day and night
I want to hold you
Understand that I am going to love you
In my own special way
Baby would you walk me home
I don't want to go all the way alone
Baby would you walk with me home
Baby would you take my hand
Come with me now to our special land,
Baby would you walk with me home

♥ The cry of my heart -Yeah im smiling:D but im dying inside

8:16:00 AM

YYY

amazingly i slept at 1am lol
woke up at 10plus.
had a really weird dream .
but i forgotten easily.
online.. den meet char at amk at 1.30
went bugis to find some stuffs.
trained there. alot ppl der lor..
finally reached. den go street.
walk walk walk.. we like walk very fast lidat
lol. den bought drinks and headed to junction.
the traffic light is lagg de lor. stood there like a few mins?
lols. den went wallet shop den went eat den
headed to ps to shop and bought a pinafore:DD
den we went to play pool haha.
till 8plus den i took 166 frm there.
den char waited for 147 and alot of banglas. lols!
alighted at hub den walked back home
was about to cross the road..one person stood beside me
den i ignored and looked out for cars
and its julia! =DD haha long time no see .
den walk and chat, stood at my block de lift chit chat
den went home. its like 9plus:)
watched tv, long time nv watch alrd lols
den bathe and i was here..
PPL , SORRY TT ITS POSTPONED:/
CHAR. CHEER UP! =DD

im learning to let go

learning to be strong

learning to be independent

learning to accept sucky reality

getting use to cry alone

getting use to the empty seat beside

getting use to suffer alone

getting use to walk alone in the dark

its really hard. time shall help ?

hope everything come to an end

full stop! and time stop flying!

i cut ur wings laa.lols.

♥ The cry of my heart -Yeah im smiling:D but im dying inside

7:48:00 AM

YYY

Wednesday, November 7

big girls dont cry

La da da da

The smell of your skin lingers on me now
You're probably on your flight back to your home town
I need some shelter of my own protection baby
To be with myself in center
Clarity, peace, serenity

[chorus:] I hope you know, I hope you know
That this has nothing to do with you
It's personal, myself and I
We've got some straightenin' out to do
And I'm gonna miss you like a child misses the blanket
But I've got to get a move on with my life
It's time to be a big girl now And big girls don't cry
Don't cry, don't cry, don't cry

The path that I'm walking, I must go alone
I must take the baby steps till I'm full grown, full grown.
Fairytales don't always have a happy ending, do they?
And I forseek the dark ahead if I stay

[chorus:]
I hope you know, I hope you know
That this has nothing to do with you
It's personal, myself and I
We've got some straightenin' out to do
And I'm gonna miss you like a child misses the blanket
But I've got to get a move on with my life
It's time to be a big girl now
And big girls don't cry

Like the little school mate in the school yard
We'll play jacks and uno cards
I'll be your best friend and you'll be my valentine
Yes you can hold my hand if you want to
'Cause I want to hold yours too
We'll be playmates and lovers and share our secret worlds

But it's time for me to go home
It's getting late, dark outside
I need to be with myself in center
Clarity, peace, serenity
Yeah

[chorus:]
I hope you know, I hope you know
That this has nothing to do with you
It's personal, myself and I
We've got some straightenin' out to do
And I'm gonna miss you like a child misses the blanket
But I've got to get a move on with my life
It's time to be a big girl now
And big girls don't cry
Don't cry, don't cry, don't cry

La da da da da da

i tink im big enuf?

shall stopp all the crying and sobbing

i haf suffered enuf its torturing and tiring.

it shall come to an end i guessed.

hate to let go but theres no way.

♥ The cry of my heart -Yeah im smiling:D but im dying inside

7:34:00 PM

YYY

07-11-07
CAIXUAN DEARDEAR!
HAPPY ONE YR ANNIVERSARY!<3
I LOVE YOO! muacks and hugges:D
MISS YA! CYA SOON! TAKE CARES(:
TUESDAY
woke up at 10 i supposed?
raining :/ got ready and went amk hub find hwee
den went white sands walk walk
wait for char:) meanwhile wonder if could see snail
but he crawl frm back door! lols
made our xiaoxin stickers:D haha
den went interchange meet guang and gang
den walked to chalet. left our bags
they started playing cards
awhile later,me and hwee go beach haf fun:D
HAHA. we yelled like mad. hehe =p
den went back. be xiaojies X)
waited inside enjoying air con while the guys
start the fire =X budden after tt we got help too ! :)
haha. bbq bbq bbq . eat eat eat.
den time flew lols. 9plus alrd. char and nick gotta go
den hwee went off at 10plus. me and guang sent her out:)
her mama is funny der lo. flying kisses. catch catch ahha.
den we walked back while they still bbqing chit chat
den smth happened. haix. knew tt it would happen
i bathe first.den kimberly den guang den jc
den jw den yz den datou
we were complained tt we were too noisy =X ooops SORRY
den we all went out for a walk .night walk lols
den went white sands de 7eleven buy drinks:)
den walked back lol. den went mac buy apple pie
den return to chalet. i wan sleep! yawns! abt 3am reached
they on tv den watch the jing ling show
den some fall asleep .tt datou keep watching tv.
no tired de meh . lols. 5plus he still watching!
it started raining:/ i slept after tt.
was woke up by kimberly. yawns
den checked out.after all i tink it is quite quiet?
went white sands de kopitam
ate our breakfast den took 88 back home
sh*t urgent! i need the toilet and its was like the bus
is still at hougang OMG reached amk i ran home.
is xinku der lor! arghhs . wtf
den get changed and went amk hub
find wenjia den go training tgt:)
din really play with mf tdy only paired thrice?
end of trng. do frog jump! OUCH
i hate tt i will nt be able to go down the stairs!
thanks guys! for cheering me on :) its so pain
tt i cried. nt only becos of tt i nt so cry baby =X
haix. den headed home my cousin came my hse!
she cut her hair long time nv see her alrd!
den i went jogging with her. amk jog to yck den
to anderson den back home:)
bathe and i was here.
PPL! SORRY if i was moody and dao or wat.
and din reply ur msg asap. sry nick><

i miss ur presence

but if u're present will it be worse?

but nothing could be changed.

after all i guess

i shud haf cried enuf ?

its time to rly let go

it shud come to an end.

no matter how much tears i shed

i still couldnt change the reality

reality is cruel cos they are real

i like crying in the rain, cuz no one knows im crying...

♥ The cry of my heart -Yeah im smiling:D but im dying inside

7:20:00 AM

YYY

Monday, November 5

Thats When I Love You

when you hav to look away,
when you don't hav much to say,
dats wen i love you
I love you
juz that way

2 hear you stumble when you speak
or see you walk with two left feet
That's when I love you
I love you endlessly
And when you're mad cause you lost a game
Forget im waiting in the rain
Baby I love you
I love you anyway

Cause here's my promise made tonight
You can count on me for life
Cause that's when I love you
When nothing you do could change my mind
The more I learn the more I love
The more my heart can't get enough
That's when I love you
When I love you no matter what

So when you turn to hide your eyes
Cause the movie, it made you cry
That's when I love you
I love you a little more each time

And when you can't quite match your clothes
Or when you laugh at your own jokes
That's when I love you
I love you more than you know

And when you forget that we had a date
Or that look that you give when you show up late
Baby I love you
I love you anyway

Cause here's my promise made tonight
You can count on me for life
Cause that's when I love you
When nothing you do could change my mind
The more I learn the more I love
The more my heart can't get enough
That's when I love you
When I love you no matter what

That's when I love you
When nothing baby
Nothing you do could change my mind
The more I learn the more i love
The more my heart can't get enough
Thats when I love you
When I love you No matter what

No matter what

♥ The cry of my heart -Yeah im smiling:D but im dying inside

5:51:00 AM

YYY

slept at 5am early in the mrn
lols den woke up at 2.30 OMG
gonna be late.quickly get changed
and left home and trained to yck
phew lucky i was on time.
START: do warm up. drills ..
den do duo qiu . den play match
den ended. i din played very well tdy:(
suck. cant smash properly:(
haix. coach told me
right leg to move in front
run bigger steps
che sheng to hit
den trng end and get changed
took 162 den go ave10 buy things.
went home,bathe ,ate my dinner
and i was here.
cant wait for tmr's BBQ haha! excited=p

ever since the day you went away

you left me alone and cold

my life just hasnt been the same

my broken heart continues to beat on

after you aint as impt,u're jus my entertainment

♥ The cry of my heart -Yeah im smiling:D but im dying inside

4:46:00 AM

YYY

Saturday, November 3

lalalas

HAPPY BIRTHDAY NIKO DARLING! LOVES<3

woke up at 9 tdy
slept for only 4hours
yawns. bathe. watch doraemon
den get ready to meet yingen and zhihow
den shirly came my hse to find me den we went down tgt they are "fast" der lor. they need make-up issit haiyo den took 162 to far east plaza. reached there den stood there and watched the hip-hop dance competition. XXhow's cousin performing(:
den we watched till 12plus, ate at long john silver
den went shop for XXgen's vast
he tried two vast. the second one.
the button came off OMG is paiseh de lo
HAHA. den went walk walk .
go hereen find XXhow's jacket den walked to ps
still cant find. den XXhow and XXgen gotta go
do revision. den went off first.
me and shirly go walk walk. met xuan dearr and
dearr der baobeii :D hellos! haha
den shirly went niko hse. den i went home
get changed and headed to little india.
bathe. talked on fone. slack and i was here.

i tot tt everything its ok alrd but it doesnt seems so

theres still a stranger feel, why? i only wanna be normal

i hate to let u go and u flew.wad can i do?

i could only suffer silently

helding on to the grudge and live on

hatred and sucked up

♥ The cry of my heart -Yeah im smiling:D but im dying inside

10:23:00 AM

YYY

Friday, November 2

FRIDAY: my life is colourless.

woke up at 12 tdy =p
ate my lunch.. use com .
den wenjia called ask me to go early
okie! den left hse at 1plus
waited for 162 . is long der lor
raining again.
reached yck alot ppl -.-
looked for wenjia den put my bag
go toilet den played awhile
saw meigui and soonkiat!
slack slack slack 3pm liao
start trng: played netting, pushing and lobbing
with two shuttles ,its quite hard
do footwork.. den played match
den duo chiu den jump jump jump
jeremy and jona came! lols
den rest den played match den footwork
den stretching den coach talk
he will always ask if theres any qns.
we will say no, den this time we did the same thing
we were scolded for having no qns.
but really dunnno mahh . nvm
try finding qns next trng. .
went RP with wenjia play badminton
with gandang and gary
gary is funny:D his evil laughter
gandang is pervert laa. =.= HAHA
den 9plus bathe and went home
on our way to woodlands MRT
theres someone in the back of the lorry
hitting and banging frm inside
it looks like he trapped himself inside.
so errie:/ quick quick walk
den trained home. and i was here:)

since the day u went away

my heart is broken & nt mended

amazingly im still alive but sicked

im feeling tt im spending everyday meaningless

perhaps im wasting time

im always alone,used to,had to,learning to

i had to train train train!!!!!!!!

jiayous! lols:)

♥ The cry of my heart -Yeah im smiling:D but im dying inside

9:20:00 AM

YYY

Thursday, November 1

THURSDAY

woke up at 8 tdy was disturbed
tot gt food eat den wake up
den my dad bought wrong
i dont eat soup noodle =X
and i dont eat dried noodle with chilli
den lie on bed do nth.
okay i shud do smth else.
watch la bi xiao xin:)
den went out with caixuan dearr at 12.30
go orchard. ate at mac
shop at herren , far east walkwalk
take neoprints den headed to tampines
to find guang. we took bus 518
is a long trip. i fell asleep on the bus
sorry dearr=p den i woke up
whr are we.. seems lost. den alight
waited for bus 39 tt is straight to tampines
boarded, tapped. i realised we took tt bus 518 is expressway
is damn EX!!! cheated! wasted so much time.
finally reached tampines! ran to food junction find guang.
lols. nt fun he turned ard when we were behind
we decided to queue up and buy drinks frm him lols
den he went out and chat with us.
tt guang keep diao my dearr. lols.
den we ate and talk talk talk and left
he continued his work . me and dearr
went shopping den went home.
she took bus 39 , i took bus 22:)
i feel sick..my throat is pain..
my breath is liked very warm?
the feeling of having a fever? tts sucky.
GUANG thanks for the drink! haha
Dearr sorry tt i fell asleep =X
I LOVE YOU DEARR:D

i miss ur presence

i miss ur hug

i miss ur warm

i miss ur shoulder

but u're just nt there

u dun haf to avoid me.

u're jus ignorance

♥ The cry of my heart -Yeah im smiling:D but im dying inside

7:40:00 AM

YYY